Choosing to be Authentic

Round Table Aug. 18th, 7:30pm (PST) Zoom link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/89107021351

“When you are authentic, you create a certain energy… people want to be around you because you are unique.” – Andie MacDowell

As women, we naturally are caretakers of the people and lives around us. Though I applaud our nurturing roles, we can accomplish loving others and loving ourselves without compromising ourselves. Without a strong sense of who we are created to be, we can get lost in the demands of others and do what is convenient or fulfilling for them. After a time, we lose even the desire to fight for our authentic self because we have built a world and expectations from others around this pretender allowed to live in place of our true self.

When asked, “Who are you?” most people tell us what they do…I am a teacher,

a mom, a plumber, a cashier, a lawyer, etc. They tell us what they do, not who they are. They cannot tell you who they are because they have not defined themselves. They have not asked themselves the hard questions or they do not know the questions to ask. Often, they simply do not know who they are yet.

Discovering your Badass self or our genuine self requires looking from the inside out. We may be imitating who we think we should be or who we think the world says we should be. There is a time and a place for imitating who we want to be, but there is also a time when that practice stops serving us. We waste the time and unique talents we bring to the world. When we know there is more to us and chose to stay where we are, we become imposters. Imposters waste giftings, talents, deny inner joy and the energy to pursue life as we were designed to do. Worse, we give up control of our inner self and are tossed on a whim to be what the outside definitions demand.

Being an On Purpose Person!

Each new year gives us an opportunity to start new, to become a person that

lives life intentionally.  Living on purpose might mean many things to many people for me it means simplifying  where I spend my time, money, energy, and passions. I want to be healthy physically, spiritually, emotionally, socially, and spend my energy on things that will make a lasting difference in this world. I took some time to decide goals for the year for all things important.

The STRATEGY techniques listed below will not give you the answers to your

goals, but they may help you build the foundation to start.

Still – Sit intentionally quiet. Ask yourself, if failure were no option and I have already succeeded, what would I be passionate about doing? How am I unique to my product or business? How will I pass that on?

Tools – Do what you must do to acquire the tools you need to do what you want

to do. Set up your office to promote efficiency. If that means buying a new pc, then do it. If it means purchasing software, then do it. Having the proper tools will save you time and allow you to do what only you can do.

Research — There is a saying out there that says, “Inspect what you expect.” Often people dream about building a business, setting personal goals, or achievements, but they fail to research thoroughly. I had a student once that planned to spend 100K for a college education that would net a job that paid $45K annually.  Once they discovered the day-to-day workings of the job, and the amount of top pay they could receive, they wisely chose another profession and another college.  

Ask for help — Follow and engage with others that are doing what you want to

do. Mentorships can cut your learning curve to success in half by sharing with you the strengths and pitfalls of your desire. Share with them your plan (the one you created in the first step here) and get their opinion on your strategy.

Training — Do not take a shotgun approach to your training. Because you have

taken time to research what you want to do, and have asked others, you will have a strong idea of the training needed. Then get the training. Once you have become an expert in your field, then remember your roots and pass on the training to someone else lower on the ladder than yourself. 

Energize your passion — Inspiration will look different for each person; seek what

works for you to be excited about the hard climb you are embarking on.

Give back — Once you have become an expert in your field, and earning income you can share, be certain to return what you have been given. You might share your finances, your knowledge, your time volunteering where help is needed.

You first, then others — There is a reason that airlines tell you in an emergency

to place your mask on your face, then on your child’s—without you, the child suffers. I have learned to take time and care of myself in order to keep it all going for the rest of my family. I had to fight with feeling guilty, but now I understand that a ship cannot sail out to sea if it is taking on water or sinking.

Pick Up Your Sword:

  1. What part of the strategy do you need to improve on? 

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  • What does living intentionally mean to you? 

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  • Do something that brings you joy. Intentional living means being deliberate with your day. Be clear about the results you want for the day. What are they? 

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  • To be intentional you need to encourage personal growth. What does that look like for you?

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  • Take time to define your personal beliefs and then evaluate how you line up with those beliefs. Do you need to add or take away people or activities?  _____________________________________________________________

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